The funniest review that I got of our game Cut The Box is :
“It have me a virus !!! Don’t download…It seems that the latest build has fixed that so I give it a 4 star now :)”
“Sucks! I wish I could rate it below 1 star. When font is fixed this is a 5 star app.”
What’s even funnier than the reviews, are the crazy emails from people that are mad about it having ads in the app…There are too many to count like “This app gave my phone a virus!!! You should go jump off a bridge!!!”
I mostly receive empty e-mails or e-mails with gibberish. Once I got “the game is too good” 
I think it was a complement.
Just got this a few minutes ago, perfect for this thread…facepalm…
I got : ‘The best game of my Life’ with a one star rating
I get a lot of these…lol…My app has nothing to do with ringtones, either. Two awesome reviews in a row!
Hm, I do not have such funny reviews 
But I do have really stupid reviews, some of them really makes me angry, my favorites are:
-
I got review like “Bad support! Developer called me stupid, and adviced me to learn to use my phone!” - when I saw it, I was just schocked, and replied, that I do not know what does he means. He than replied directly on my mail that he has some problem with app and needed fast reply - so he made such review! When I replied something like that I will help him of course, but he should firstly change his review as he is absolutely lying - he answered back that I am rude, and he needs ASAP help without any conditions
Jesus, this customer was really the biggest retard I ever had… -
next favorite review was like “Do not buy this app, it is fraud! It is only icon, and does nothing! I can’t believe how many people buyed this as this app DOES NOTHING” - of course, it was from some stupid user, which didn’t know what is widget and tried to convince few thousand users, that they actually payed for nothing and he’s the cleverest one
I made an SAT vocab app two years ago, and back then before I knew how to scrape the internet I added words/definitions manually. It had 100 words in the original version and the first 1-star review was:
Japanese I was able to tell the developer of this app is japanese because out of 100 words there words like kimono n stuff
NOTE: kimono was the only Japanese word it had 
I couldn’t resist responding and said:
I’ll add the words taco and hinduism in the next update so I can say I’m mexican and indian
so annoying!!!
You should not answer like that, it will not change anything, and does not look good for user, plus you can piss them off even better.
I have an app that crashes on purpose on devices after 4.1
You only get the laugh, when you keep in mind, that Maxim is a russian name
i 
Stereotypes xD
Crashes on purpose? What do you mean? Do you hate 4.1 or something? 
The comment is hilarious though.
Some guys didn’t believe me that you can make an app working just on older devices, nut this is another story ^^
Yep, I found it extremely funny as well
This wasn’t a review, but it was a user message on one of the crash report in the developer console:
y has my app stopped again I don’t think you people apresheate that I’m a paying Custermer I pay my bill every month I know the app is free but dam you know can we get some dissent service please . - disappointed .
I thought that was pretty funny!
Very good. 
I once got a review saying that the main character of my game, that in some point of the game is confused, wasn’t confused, was drunk.
I have so many of these… OR even better something like “great app” and 1 star.
Best of the week : a guy writing I am probably “funding my app from mafia money”. WTF…
I received a 1 star rating with this comment a while back:
“Awesome Simply awesome game, beautiful gfx, tons of fun, really recommend to download. NOT. I love you too Nick. Congrats on the game, well done!”
I later looked through some “similar” apps and found that somebody named Nick left a comment for a competing app and mentioned my app. I guess their developer thought I was Nick.