My partner and I are expecting and asked his mom who was living with us due to her poor life choices to move into an apartment on her own so that we can have the bedroom back for our baby that’s due soon. She’s in the process of moving out and I started my maternity leave a couple weeks ago as I’m a nurse in a hospital and cannot physically do my job for 12 hours while 8 months pregnant so my OB put me on medical leave until the baby arrives. Fast forward to tonight, normally I send him a set amount of money towards the mortgage every month. Now that his mother is leaving he asked me tonight to start sending him more so that we are both paying half now that his mother will no longer be giving him money to stay here. So I mentioned well I could but my income is currently less than minimum wage and less than half of what I normally make, that I’m incredibly low on money now until I go back to work. He didn’t bat an eye. He currently brings in 4x what I do on maternity leave. Am I being unreasonable pointing out that I’m making way bigger financial sacrifices with this baby coming. I feel like it’s completely unreasonable to expect bills to be paid 50/50 when my income is cut to next to nothing and I’m growing a baby and off work to raise his child. It feels like I’m expected to suffer the consequences while nothing changes financially for him. We don’t split the cooking or the cleaning or the laundry 50/50 I do almost all of it. Am I missing something?
I see it’s been a while since this was discussed, but I’m curious—how do things feel now for those who were in this situation? Have any of your perspectives or arrangements changed over time? Finances in a marriage can be tricky, especially with different income levels. If you’ve found a system that works well, I’d love to hear how you and your partner figured it out!
Splitting bills 50/50 can be tricky, especially if incomes are different. If one person earns significantly more, a proportional split might feel fairer. I’ve handled finances with my partner by making sure we both contribute based on what we can afford without feeling stretched. One way we save money is by switching to cheaper services. Why switch to Octopus Energy? Lower bills mean less stress when dividing expenses.